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The Zen of Blood, Sweat and Sh*t

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Don’t talk shit, they say! (sorry if this word offends, but also as they say, SHIT HAPPENS!)

I’ve had an epiphany, and by chance, doo-doo is something I know a little about.

But let’s go back a wee bit before I get into the main manure of this post.

My epiphany is all about the exchange of poop and its potential wonders. Praise Be Shit!

Let’s dig in, shall we?

Modern science has shown us with little doubt that transfusing blood from a young person into an older person changes the aging process, and in effect, makes the older person’s internal guts younger. It also works vice versa when transfusing from old to young.

It’s incredible and exciting and on its surface seems like a simple answer to concerns over aging.

But, to be fair, it has some worrisome aspects too.

I was a lab technologist for 37 years and I know firsthand that blood transfusion – as lifesaving as it can be – also has troublesome risks because of graft vs host rejection, just like organ transplants.

When we inject someone else’s blood into our veins, our bodies will occasionally start up the weapons’ factories, fire up the army, navy, and air force, and unleash an antibody response to a foreigner in our blood stream. It’s like the Ukraine fighting back an unwanted invader like the Russians. Russian intruders = blood transfusion… Our bodies = Ukraine…

Or maybe Obiwan vs Darth

But let’s get down and dirty now and talk shit…

Blood isn’t the only bodily “fluid” we transplant from one human to another… we also do faecal transplants to inject a healthy biome from one individual to another.

The helpful and healthful bacteria transplanted may help against a range of health conditions, from GI infections to autism spectrum disorder (ASD).

You should really give a shit about this now because Poop is more important than most of us ever realized.

Maybe it’s even a game changer.

Here’s my “wishful thinking “epiphany:

By the same notion that blood transfusion can change our internal aging clock, I’m figuring that a faecal transplant can have some pretty profound impacts too.

How about a potent and potential example or two:

  • Transplant the faecal matter of someone of great intelligence into my colon and KAZAM… I begin spouting E=mc2 like a 21st century Einstein.
  • For the narcissists and villains (sorry to equate the two) out there, we inject stool directly from each year’s Nobel Peace prize winner into the guts of louts and criminals and transform our jails overnight into the Peace Corps. Who needs gun control laws when everyone wants to hug their neighbours around the world. Line up and bend over Putin!
  • Or, perhaps for those of us who pine to look like Chris Pine or croon like Billie Eilish or Beyonce? Pack it in the back door, and start singing or acting like the diva or thespian you always dreamed of becoming.

One last thought… for the larger expanse of us beings who are reasonably content with our inner and outer souls but might feel the need of a refreshing refresh…

… you know, a need to flush our brains of external “shit”.

This information excrement that others have transplanted inside us, often without our knowledge or consent, needs to be flushed from our systems.

An annual FT (Faecal Transplant) treatment could be the hallowed road to peace and harmony, world and inner peace.

Register for yours today… then…

Sing it with me… All We Are Saying… is… Give Shit a Chance

Are You a CT?

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CLEVER Type? … to be clever is not an easy achievement.

Clever is not synonymous with being smart – un-unh – it’s nuanced… clever can come from the bowels of the lowliest of troglodytes to the brains of the Masters of the Universe *are you talking about ME?! aw, shucks*

Nope. Not smart. Not really.

OK… I’ll bend a bit and accept that to be clever does take some intelligence.

Maybe, just maybe… cleverness is one of the 12 (originally 9 but expanded over the years) intelligences as described by Howard Gardner in 1983.

1. Logical-mathematical intelligence

2. Linguistic intelligence

3. Spatial intelligence

4. Body-kinesthetic intelligence

5. Musical intelligence

6. Interpersonal intelligence

7. Intrapersonal intelligence

8. Naturalistic intelligence

9. Emotional intelligence

10. Existential intelligence

11. Creative intelligence

12. Collaborative intelligence

… or maybe clever is a handy combination of a group of the 12 intelligences in one neat package… hmmmmm…

To look at something, to express something in a very different way is to be clever.

Clever is really a pseudonym for innovation with ideas, thoughts, words and actions. Kinda like IDEA SEX.

Clever to me is an adroitness with ideas, a facility with finding something we don’t usually see with casual observance.

I took the shell off my racing snail to make him go faster. Now he’s sluggish

I personally think that Dad jokes are clever, but… wrong!… I’m struck down immediately by my kids when I try out my so-called cleverness… I just need another outlet!

People that are clever notice things that others don’t- they find a way out of the box, a facility to take practical and learned knowledge and come to an independent conclusion about something. Clever people break ground.

Oscar Wilde was clever. Charles Dickens and Jane Austen were clever. Monty Python was clever. Jerry Seinfeld, Picasso, Alexander Graham Bell, Marie Curie, Steve Jobs and Joni Mitchell – all clever. I begrudgingly admit that even Donald Trump is clever, just not in a way that I appreciate.

You can be clever and stupid at the same time *see comment about Trump above*.

Clever and stupid?

I admire cleverness. I strive for cleverness because it’s rare.

I aim for cleverness and sometimes when I’m writing a blog post or song lyrics, or crafting a chord combination for a song, I say to myself, “that was clever Larry“. All I’m saying when I mumble this to myself is that I’ve found a way to express a thought, idea, or emotion that excels, that I haven’t consciously seen or heard before. Cleverness= Originality.

When I hear a song or watch a movie that says something that I’ve never heard expressed before, I feel enthused and excited. Originality is tough to find.

The great thing about cleverness in our consumer-oriented society is that it usually doesn’t cost a cent and yet gives us the buzz of internal excitement, a feeling of life being really lived, not just observed.

Being smart is good. You want to be smart. In today’s world, to thrive you should be smart.

But to experience an elevated emotional state takes a different kind of smart, a different kind of intelligence.

So shed your embarrassment over the CT term and rise up and show the world that you are a proud CT… you know, Clever-Type!

Mom Joke!

I LOVE my Apple Watch, But I Wonder If It’s Worth It?

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LOVE LOVE LOVE … sang the Beatles and… yes indeed, I DO love my Apple Watch.

I’ve only had it since Christmas of last year (thanks Maureen) but I’ve already come down with a real case of WatchTwitterpation. Maybe you’re in the same boat?

The Apple Watch is a fantabulous Dick Tracy Sci-Fi piece of technology strapped to my wrist that connects me both internally and externally to the world. Ain’t Nerd’dom great?

Even more incredible is that the Apple Watch is really in its infancy… there is so much more to come that I can’t wait to see.

My watch:

  • wakes me up in the morning…
  • tells me how well and how long I slept…
  • monitors my heart rate and resting pulse rates while sleeping and running and swimming (without asking, it tells me how fast my swim laps are)…
  • tells me what the weather looks like right now and if it will rain or snow today…
  • measures my blood oxygen levels…
  • takes an ECG readout of my heart…
  • carries music and podcasts and news reports…
  • and in true Dick Tracy style, I can make and answer phone calls while talking at my wrist!

OMG… there’s much more, so much in fact that it – almost… almost – has filled the gap of dearly-departed Olivia Newton-John whom I’ve been *at a far distance, no stalking here, NOPE* Hopelessly Devoted to for… oh… 50’ish years. You held the voice and face of an angel Olivia…

But, dammit all, like so many wonderful things, that old Blessing and the Curse storyline comes into play where technology is concerned.

The Apple Watch is a blessing in my life, but at the same time… I can’t overlook the curse, the dangers, that technology as a general theme has also wrought on our society ie. Social Media..

My infatuation with this wonderful world of technology has simultaneously blinded me to the wave, the tsunami – dare I say, plague – that is upon us.

Social media like Facebook and Twitter (along with many other perhaps less worrisome apps) are transforming the world at a frantically furious and scary pace.

The positive explosion of instant information connected to everything internet has also brought us a cataclysmic bombshell of unknowing, often vile, and willful ignorance and misinformation.

In years gone by, average folks would stand in bemusement in the grocery store checkout line, giggling at the amusing headlines and farcical nonsense of the colourful National Enquirer tabloid magazines and its like.

Now, millions of otherwise intelligent (but certainly not always) people read and absorb similar nonsense in an army of different web-based sites filled with ignorance and avoidance of facts; true journalism as taught in colleges and universities, where fact-checking and close scrutiny to what is printable has dwindled dramatically.

So many today stare at their TV screens watching FOX “news”… or oxymoronic “reality TV”… where nonsensical conspiracy theories capture the hearts and minds of those who choose not to look closely and rationally, either through laziness or confirmation bias.

All of the wondrous stuff that technology promises and delivers is smeared by the accompaniment of 3D print guns… revenge porn… weapons technology that kills and maims from thousands of kilometres distant… cellphones that contribute to the lack of social skills and personal interaction… governments unable to govern…

This all leaves me in a quandary of bewilderment.

I want so badly to believe in the goodness of humankind and the progress that has made the world what it is in so many beautiful ways.

Yet at the same time, I look down at my watch and ponder… if the benefits of this blessing are worth the worrisome curse of the technology virus.

I’m still humming harmonious Beatles love songs, but the genie is out of the bottle and I worry.

Build Back Better Within… To 100 Years and Beyond…

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Build back better? … sure, improving infrastructure sounds pretty good to most of us, yes?

But I’m not here to talk about government and public infrastructure… roads, bridges, transit systems…

This morning, I’m going to hit you with your personal infrastructure… your muscles, your mind, your circulation.

When we’re young’ish, many (I wish more) of us begin to anticipate what life will look like when we finally reach the “R” (retirement) stage of life.

Those who are forward thinking (all of YOU, I am certain), plan for a financial future that allows them to live a comfortable existence well into their 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, 90’s and on and on for those with very optimistic views. I’ve already harped at you quite a bit about this in earlier posts… I’m a Numbers’ Guy.

And so while your money situation may -hopefully – be secure and impressive, how many of us think about our physical infrastructure well into the future… how will this duo – our body and brain – hold up over time?

After all, the state of this mortal anatomy we occupy for our lives is a strong indicator of our length of life (lifespan) and more importantly, our quality of life (healthspan).

I don’t want to lecture you here *of course you do Larry*, but I hope you’ll at least consider and mull over some of what I’m proposing, to think if this is important to you.

Today I want to refer back to something I’ve alluded to in past posts… something called the CENTENARIAN OLYMPICS.

It’s a term coined by Dr. Peter Attia, a Canadian-born physician and surgeon who practices in Texas these days. He is a proponent – you might say messiah – of longer lifespans and healthspans for us all.

Attia urges us all to look ahead not only 5 or 10 years… but 30, 40, or more years… look out to 100 years of age… and enact the things we need to do today to assist us in having optimal health, decades into the future.

Sounds pretty much like a retirement savings plan if you ask me, but with our health substituting for money.

We often hear the aphorism that the most important thing we can have is our health… money is fabulous (I love money!), but without a feeling of robust wellbeing, how much enjoyment is there to be found in money, other than the cash to purchase the drugs that dull our pains, the meds to lower our blood pressure, lipids and sugar levels (which are all very important things for sure)?

Attia is a physician/scientist who takes deep dives into those things we should be doing right now that will have the best likelihood of carrying us in an upright physical and mental state to our distant futures.

Why wait until our systems begin breaking down before taking positive action? Isn’t an ounce of prevention worth a pound of cure? Who can argue with this?

This is where the whole idea of Centenarian Olympics unfolds.

The term doesn’t truly mean a superhuman existence with medals and acclaim at age 100…

Nope, the Centenarian Olympics are a totally personal quest to acquire and maintain a level of physical and mental health that allows us the independence and health that an older person would want at the age of 100.

It generally won’t happen for most of us by accident, just as we usually won’t retire with a ton of money by accident. Think ahead… Plan plan plan!

Of course, reaching 100 is not only a physical journey, but a cognitive and emotional one as well, so it needs adequate functioning in these areas:

**Cognitive — executive function, processing speed, and memory
**Physical — stability, flexibility, mobility, strength, balance, muscle mass, aerobic efficiency, anaerobic peak, functional movement and freedom from pain.
**Emotional — mindfulness, social support, sense of purpose, fulfillment, and distress tolerance.

Today, I’m only touching on the physical side of longevity, and even here, it’s a mere scratch-of-the-surface look. I’ll return another day to talk about Cognitive and Emotional health.

I won’t go into great detail about the physical and activity items that will increase our chances of “healthspan” success… but I will share a few examples of those things Peter Attia suggests so that you are able at 100 to:

    1. Climb out of a pool unaided.
    2. Get up off the floor unaided.
    3. Lift young kids/grandkids off the ground.
    4. Carry groceries up and down flights of stairs.
    5. Help fellow passengers lift their carry-ons into an overhead bin.

Here goes: some things to do today so that you increase your chances of being able to do those things above at 100 (all of these exercises are easily found via Mr. GOOGLE!):

  • Strength training such as 30lb. goblet squats, deadlifts, single-arm lifts.
  • Core strength exercises – yoga, planks, pilates, glute bridges.
  • Low-intensity rowing
  • Low-intensity running
  • Low-intensity cycling

Bottom line: The message I’m urging you to absorb today is to think about your future health the way you would think about your financial retirement.

Recognize that your level of functioning will inevitably dwindle (unless/until research finds a way to halt this too), but the steps you take now – today – will slow this decline, assisting you to enjoy your life more while in reasonable health for many years to come.

Think decades, not months or years.

  • OK, it’s summer, enjoy a jump in the lake, lecture is over (for this post!), so I’ll leave you with a discussion (below) where Attia mulls over his thinking on attaining 100 years of age in reasonable condition: